Someone PLEASE turn down the music in here. The background music they normally play during dressage to cancel out random noise that bothers the horse, and to lull the borderline interested into a light snooze, is being played at near rock concert volume. I imagine the point is to render dressage more palatable by making everything look like a freestyle, but people just aren’t meant to sustain eight hours a day of instrumental pop covers. It’s too loud and it’s making me twitchy. I do dressage music for a living but even I am sick of the Royal Philharmonic’s version of Wonderwall.

I’ve been avoiding the toilets by thirsting myself each day, but some friends from Alberta texted me yesterday to say the spectators were close to revolt. All the women’s facilities had flooded (complete with floaters I’ve been told) and they’d resorted to using the men’s. If there is anything that defines an event more memorably than what’s on stage, it’s the bathroom experience.

One thing even the bathrooms can’t take away from our experience here is the magnificent sport going on here today. Valegro has it all sewn up, but Damon Hill gave him a good run for his money. As always, the judges look the other way when the top guns commit their pecadillos, but I have to admit my appetite for adding to the Sin Bin is greatly reduced by the pure pleasure of watching all the spectacular horses and riders. But I still wish they’d turn the bloody music down.