We held a practice for the fundraiser, Sunday October 3rd. Allen Kalpin had promised to provide the music for several acts with his guitar. As I was working Kye at liberty I heard Allen singing. The tune was “Blowing in the Wind”, but the words were a bit different… something like, “How many tricks does a horse have to do, before you give him a treat?”
I was thrilled. Wow! Creative genius! After the practice I asked Allen if he could dream up a few more verses of that song and find a song for Zelador and for Zeloso. We started brainstorming and I remembered a song sung by Alexandra Kurland in her Clicker Training video for horses. It was to the tune of “Oh, Lord, won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz.” Allen kept Alexandra’s first verse and added a few of his own. The third song is “Home on the Range”.
Here are the three songs. They were an excellent background to the tricks and liberty of each horse. The audience had visual and audio stimulus!
Blowing in the Wind
How many tricks does a horse have to do before you will give him a treat?
How many toys does a horse have to carry before he gets something to eat?
How many bells does a horse have to ring before there’s no need to repeat?
The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind. The answer is blowing in the wind.
How many clicks will that little clicker make before he touches a ball?
How many feet can that ball roll along before it stops at the wall?
How many times must a horse trot around, before he can rest in his stall?
The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind. The answer is blowing in the wind.
How many games does a horse have to play to keep a man entertained?
How many tricks does the horse have to do, before his owner is trained?
How many pedestals does a horse have to climb before a lawyer’s retained?
The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind. The answer is blowing in the wind.
Clicker Trained Horse
Oh Lord, won’t you bring me a clicker trained horse
My friends think I’m crazy, but I’m tired of force
No gizmos, no gadgets, no grounds for divorce
Oh Lord, won’t you bring me a clicker trained horse
Oh Lord, won’t you bring me a horse clicker trained
Does tricks without spurs and without even reins
There’s no need for harshness – you just use your brains
Oh Lord, won’t you bring me a horse clicker trained
Oh Lord won’t you bring me a horse trained by clicker
I want my horse healthy, I don’t want him sicker
Don’t want him to squeal, just want him to nicker
Oh Lord won’t you bring me a horse trained by clicker
Oh Lord, won’t you bring me a clicker trained horse
My friends think I’m crazy, but I’m tired of force
No gizmos, no gadgets, no grounds for divorce
Oh Lord, won’t you bring me a clicker trained horse
Home on the Range
Oh give me a home where the buffalo don’t roam
And the cats and the trick horses play
Where seldom is heard a discouraging word
And horses play games all the day
How often at night when the heavens are bright
With lights in the arena ablaze
We practice quadrille till we’ve all had our fill
And our poor noggins are in such a daze
Where the air is so pure, besides the smell of manure
I love doing my liberty work
‘Course I could run away from Winnie any day
But I’d never be such a jerk
Oh, I do love to play day after day
I love carrots – their taste and their smell
Winnie counts “one, two, three,” and she gives them to me
I think I have trained her quite well!!
